2. Steve Freeling - Poltergeist (1982) - Horror movies are notorious for bad husbands. Husbands who never listen to their wives when they say, "We should probably move because the walls are dripping with blood and I'm hearing voices." Even as recently as Paranormal Activity this pattern has been repeated. But Poltergeist is the one shining exception. Here, Craig T. Nelson takes yet another spot on the list for his portrayal of a husband supporting his family through, of all things, a nasty haunting. A husband who never forgets that his wife is still a woman throughout the ordeal. A husband who is honest about his stress, loses his cool now and then, but always comes through as a figure of unending support, taking action, and responding intuitively to the needs of a family. This is a movie just as much about family as it is about ghosts. It's also rife with metaphor if you're willing to watch for it. Take for example, the rope scene. The husband literally holds on to his wife and creates a supportive base from which she can go into a scary situation and solve a problem. On top of all that, darn if Craig T. Nelson isn't just a very attractive fella...
3. Phil Foster - Date Night (2010) - Jake and I just saw this last weekend. (Jake's my husband if you're new to the blog.) Aside from the genius casting, the character of Phil pines for a better life with his wife and not without her. He's bored, but there's never even a question or mention of infidelity. It's a great portrayal of a husband who knows his wife well and is jealous for her affections. The dinner scenes the two share prove that they can still make each other laugh and enjoy spending time together when they get the chance to take a break from their overscheduled lives.
5. Clark Griswold - The National Lampoon Vacation Movies (1983 - 1997) - The man may be the worst vacation and holiday planner in the history of the world, but he's a good husband. A bumbling one, but a good one. One who welcomes relatives, wants to impress in-laws, and tries to usher his wife to as many tourist destinations and special moments as humanly possible.
6. Nick - The Thin Man (1934)- This is one of the all-time best marriages in film history. Nick is a detective who accepts constant help (and sass) from his wife whom he trusts completely. Nick and Nora have fun together and know each other well enough to work as a great team. You'd be surprised at how modern the relationship seens for a film that's nearly a century old.
9. Tom Reilly - The Ex (2006) - This was a little known movie that spoke to the young couple crowd. The plot followed a married couple with a new baby as they left their city life (and professional passions) behind in order to "settle down" in a small town. Tom finds himself as a square peg in a round hole when he takes a job at his father-in-law's company, a yuppie advertising agency. Tom has to find a way to make progress and figure out the best way to be a husband and father in the face of change and pressure from other family members. Instead of simply eating the stress that life throws at him, he finds a way to work it all out, albeit sometimes a bit clumsily. This is another great flick where the couple's problem is not the constant danger of breaking up, but is instead the obstacle of figuring out how to transition from one phase of life to the next. In reality, if marriages were in constant danger of divorce just to create a sense of suspense or desire, who could live with that? Instead, this movie takes a light-hearted look at some of the more realistic struggles, and trust me...they're just as entertaining as the ever popular "risk of infidelity and divorce" storylines.
10. Rick O'Connell - The Mummy Returns (2001) - Most action adventures find two people thrown together and falling in love on the run. But this sequel (love it or hate it) shows what happens after the initial adventure. Again we have the small moments of stolen affection, (similar to those that can be seen in Poltergeist) displaying that little known fact about husbands and wives, that they can still have a vibrant and healthy marriage after many years and having children. It's something that's rarely seen in most movies. I like the idea of marriage as a continuing adventure. Why can't we married folks have big summer blockbusters? We can! Thus proving that commitment can work in every genre, even one maybe meant to mostly sell popcorn.
11. Jack - Mr. Mom (1983) - When Jack loses his job in this eighties classic, a dashing and charismatic Michael Keaton digs down deep to support his wife's career ambitions. He learns the ropes at home and takes on child-rearing responsibilities while she's out bringing in a paycheck. The film shows a husband making a concerted effort to connect with his wife, even as the temptation of infidelity presents itself. It's a film about masculinity, gender roles, comedy, and how to keep the spark alive, even (or especially) under duress. It's a film that serves as a reminder, life comes in phases, and Mr. Mom doesn't bail during a tough phase that might send many fictional men packing.
12. Paul Rusesabagina - Hotel Rwanda (2004) - This gut-wrenching drama celebrating a real-life-hero has several scenes of tender affection between Paul (played by Don Cheadle) and his wife, even amidst life-threatening danger. During a genocidal military occupation, he even finds time for a rooftop dinner to help ease her stress. Also, he seems to actually enjoy his relationship with his wife and his character appears to be stealing a few minutes with her for his sake as well as for hers. A reminder that there is an alternative option to the old "ball and chain" steretypical complaint. You can actually love your wife and enjoy spending time with her, it's true America! Don't believe the hype.
I realize after looking at this list, that there's romance in the idea of fidelity, whether the movie industry ever catches on or not. That the plot (and life) possibilities don't stop after, "I Do". We all experience doubts and troubles, quarter-life crises and mid-life crises, biological changes and scared phases and career changes and external forces at work. It's not the fact that you have those problems that makes them bad, it's how you deal with them inside of your marriage that can change you life...as they say in the marriage vows, for better or for worse.Park Geeks 80s Opening from Josh Rosentreter on Vimeo.
